I didn’t want to sound “preachy”

I didn’t want to sound “preachy,” where did that even come from?! But that’s what I thought. It was as if I began to cover my mouth and tie my hands behind my back. I have learned that you have to use wisdom when it comes to speaking. However that doesn’t mean that I have to shut up all together. Fun fact I hate that word, but it made sense to use there.

When did I begin to care how I sounded to anyone? I’m pretty outspoken and I’m certainly not one to back down from confrontation. I would much rather talk through an issue than have something on my mind and not say it. Ask my Husband! I like talking through things and coming to a place where at least honesty is on the table. Yep, let’s talk about your feelings. That’s how I am.

I Didn’t Want to Sound “Preachy” -There’s a time to speak

So with that in mind when did I start to feel like I needed to be silent and not speak when it was necessary. Especially as it pertains to what God wants me to speak, and write about. In the past I didn’t always have a lot of grace with confronting a situation, but I have grown a bit since then.

When I started blogging I really struggled with NOT wanting to sound “preachy.” So much so that there were times when writing anything at all felt hindered. It was as if a block was placed on writing anything at all. I don’t mean regular writer’s block when you can’t think of anything. More along the lines of; I was trying to write but only in a really filtered way.

I can’t really filter what feels as if it’s burning in my heart to say.

This is what I felt like; it was as if I was caging the very things I was supposed to be sharing. Iv’e spoken before about the fact that I don’t love feeling vulnerable. Whether no one reads this blog or not has never been the point. I know I am not being obedient with what God has placed in me if I don’t write on this Blog. There is no way I’m leaving my Faith out of it!

Obedience

A funny thing happens when you are obedient to what God has placed on your heart. The fear is different. There is the fear of what your perception will be and if it will make sense to anyone else. Then there is the fear of Not doing what you know you are supposed to do. I’m a very private person and I don’t like being vulnerable. The fear of being vulnerable and being known in any way is replaced by the fear of not living up to God’s plan for my life.

I heard a long time ago that “partial obedience, is still disobedience.”

I am not sure who said that but it has really stayed with me. Although I am not a shy person I am a super private person. So to write a blog where I feel like God wants me to share what HE is teaching me is super hard. But the feeling of doing the very thing I’m nervous about is so strong.

Have you ever felt that way? You felt fearful yet compelled to do the very thing you are afraid of?

Trusting God

Being obedient to what God has told me to do really requires that I trust Him with the outcome. The same goes for you, be obedient and leave the outcome up to God.

Obedience requires doing what God is moving you to do, yet leaning on Him for the strength, ability, and grace to do it. It is an act of trust. Like that “trust fall” that you may have done at some point. I remember being more willing to be the one catching the person falling than being the one that was falling. But there is trust involved in both scenarios.

There is a strong spiritual connotation to the trust fall.

I could either trust myself or I could trust God, I could have Faith in God or faith in myself. It comes down to me trusting what I can’t see. The more I think about it the more I see the correlation of obedience requiring trust, and letting go requiring faith. That’s the point of the “trust fall” exercise, I’m assuming.

The outcome is not up to me

The funny thing about all of this fight back-and-forth with myself is I am in control of my actions but not the outcome. I have no idea what God will do with any of this. The fact that when I look at God, and I trust Him, I don’t look as much at myself.

When the focus is not on me I have peace, isn’t that interesting.!? When it’s not up to me what happens, there is a safety in that fact. God holds it all together.

There is a lot of freedom in allowing God to be God… Can I get a witness (literally couldn’t resist)?!

So the fact that I didn’t want to sound “preachy” really pales in comparison to walking by Faith in my Lord. Who cares if I end up sounding “preachy.” I don’t say any of this to lift myself up. My hope is that I am obedient and because of that HE is lifted up! It’s hard when you are a private person to share one of the most personal things.

Simply put, obedience is doing what God has told us all to do in His word. I want to encourage anyone out there who is on the fence in matters of obedience. There is Peace, Security, and Freedom in being obedient to the Lord Jesus. The actions are up to us but the outcome is not. That is where Faith comes in. Trust Him today with whatever you may be struggling to hold tight to, to do or not do. The proof of our Trust in Christ is our Obedience and willingness to be used by Him and the actions that follow. It takes more effort in struggling with what we want than surrendering to what HE wants us to do.

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Until Next Time,

What will you Steward well?