In this post I wanted to share what God is teaching me and what I am learning in this season. Before this pandemic even occurred, our family has been walking through some pretty tough stuff. This “tough stuff” has been going on for what feels like forever.
Since last October 2019 some really, really, difficult things have happened that I can’t really share details about at this point. But suffice to say I am learning something amid it all, or at least trying to.
Confession: as “strong” as I am, I have had to completely lean on my Heavenly Father. I have had moments of just asking God to be near and to hold me up, so I could help hold others up.
I have clung to His word and He has so graciously given me abilities during this time that I didn’t know that I possessed. Truthfully, I don’t without him.
To put it plainly, God enables me to be okay.
What God is Teaching Me In This Season: Not giving into Pride
There are days when just as I see progress but then I’m snapped back into a new and different reality. The reason I don’t crumble with each new dilemma, challenge, and storm is because God has sheltered me and my heart.
When I’ve been tempted (and given in I might add) to be prideful I have had to come right back to him to be okay. My default is to take care of myself by any means necessary. But the Grace of Jesus has not allowed me to allow my independent, self-reliant self to get the best of me.
In so many ways Christ has saved me from myself, daily. I don’t know about you but when your back is against the wall or you’re walking through, or army-crawling through a difficult time it can be easy to default to “self.”
What God is Teaching Me: Daily Bread
But during this time of my own struggles and the struggles of others during this Pandemic God has given me my daily bread (my Manna) in different ways. Sometimes it has been listening to a Podcast that allowed me to not feel like I’m completely and utterly alone in what I may be trudging through.
Other times it’s been a sweet text from a friend or a kind word or smile from a complete stranger. The one’s that were not wearing masks (I mean literally because of Covid).
I’ve learned that it is not my strength that gets me through. Taking matters into my own hands is not the best option and God truly is my/our refuge.
Reformed From My Old Ways
As a former “do everything, by my dang self because I can’t trust or depend on anyone” reformed Woman; I can honestly say I have to fight the temptation to default to “her” [at times] on a daily basis.
Being “saved” some days means that I am saved from myself… Can I get an Amen?!
Maybe you are reading this, and you cannot relate to my specific temptations. But I’m guessing that you may have struggled with some sort of pride or something else. Either way the point is God is the one who truly holds us together.
We may be able to numb ourselves or distract ourselves but that can only last for so long.
God knows what is best and HE most certainly knows how to speak to His children.
If you do not know Jesus Christ or have not accepted Him as your lord and Savior, I encourage you to do so. He is Everything and is truly able to handle any and everything that happens in your life.
What I’m Learning During This Time: Don’t Complain
During this time, I am learning that the worst thing to do is Complain. I’ve been reading about the Israelites and feeling conviction.
After God saved them from being in Slavery to Pharaoh they were taken into the wilderness.
They had to leave behind everything that they knew and what they came to expect for their lives. They grew accustomed to the food of Egypt and were desperate for a bit of what they knew. You can read about that right here: Numbers 11:5
“Because what we ‘know’ is comfortable, even if it is bondage.“
-Style And Stewardship
They groaned and complained and even said that they were essentially better off in bondage. We read that from our vantage point, and we see that they were obviously wrong.
What If Freedom Is A Choice?
What has been on my mind as I read these passages of scripture is the fact that they could worship God freely if they chose to.
Instead of seeing the Freedom they were given in so many ways both physical and spiritual they complained. It wasn’t enough for them. In a sense God wasn’t enough for them.
So they complained
Isn’t that what we are doing when we complain? We make the thing we want or expect to be greater than the sufficiency of God. Our creature comforts become most important. Above all, above God!
“Pride is blinding and intoxicating. It takes us on a ride full of ourselves.“
-Style And Stewardship
It doesn’t allow us to see ourselves as we [actually] are.
What If We Did This Instead
What if instead of complaining we praised God not just for what He has saved us from (though Praise Him for that) but because of who He is. That is not easy, and it truly can be hard to get our flesh out of the way.
“Through Him, therefore, let us at all times offer up to God a sacrifice of praise, which is the fruit of lips that thankfully acknowledge and confess and glorify His name.”
Okay, back to the Israelites…The Lord God gave the people everything they complained about. They complained about food. God rained down Manna from heaven and made quail just appear when it was almost time for dinner.
Let’s not forget how he caused water to gush out of a rock, in a barren desert mind you.
They were given every physical need and all their needs were met. Yet they continued to complain.
What Complaining Communicates
But here’s the thing in our complaining what it [actually] communicates is pride, and arrogance. I believe at the root of every complaint there is an area of entitlement which is just another word for pride. That’s what God is teaching me while I read the example of the Israelites.
I’m just saying.
When I read about the Israelites complaining over and over, I see that God is Not pleased. Their complaints are actually against God. Exodus 16
Just a few verses before they are praising God. They don’t get what they want and just like that, the complaining begins. Isn’t that what many of us do. We go from being Thankful and praising God to murmuring and complaining when we don’t get what we think we deserve… eh hem that is entitlement.
So, complaining is one of the easiest ways to show how prideful we are. The complaint itself is typically because we are disgruntled about the way things are and feel we deserve and think things should go/be another way.
What God is Teaching Me
It is quite possible I am only speaking to myself and what God is teaching me about himself and showing me about myself.
Admitting this is one of the best ways to hold a mirror up and see myself clearly.
The world will look at our circumstances (whatever that means for you) and tell you how you “deserve” to feel the way you do. Or they will tell you if you have been wronged that you “deserve” to retaliate in some fashion.
But God does not see it that way. As a matter-of-fact Jesus when he told us how we should respond to situations that seem “unfair”. These responses are antithetical to the responses the culture tells us to have.
It is through the lens of scripture that we see what does and does not honor or please God. I’m so thankful that His mercy is new every day and He doesn’t hold my issues against me. I certainly could not do this without His grace and His Mercy.
Thank you, Jesus!
I want to encourage you to see what God thinks about all the things you may be struggling with. God has a way of showing up with Grace in-hand to help you manage your expectations, guard your heart and do what pleases Him.
It is truly for His glory and our own good.
But Do We Judge Ourselves
I’m not trying to lay a burden on anyone and for sure this is meant to encourage you and never to condemn. We have to hold up a mirror to ourselves and make sure that we are not complaining. This does not mean that we don’t have grievances, difficulties, and stress.
However, as people trying to live a life with God being our focus let’s focus on what He says. That’s what God has been teaching me through scripture.
The picture of these people brought out of bondage (which is you too if you are a believer) is that we shouldn’t go back into bondage.
Going backward in my case is leaning on me and not on God. Complaining about things rather than “casting my cares on him.” Planning for things to go a certain way and being very frustrated when they don’t and not having the right heart about it.
What Does Going Back Look Like for You
What does going back look like for you during your difficult seasons? It may look like reverting to your old ways of doing things. Maybe it shows up as a small brew of feeling anxious and clinging to “fixing everything,” “planning everything” to have control or something else.
I believe we can all glean something very powerful from looking at the reactions and actions of the Israelites that the Lord led out of slavery.
Most importantly is that with less distractions we can focus on God more. We can praise Him above the temptation to make or want things to be “perfect.”
We can be thankful instead of complaining regardless of how we may “feel.” Paul speaks of learning to be Content in whatever state we are in. Phillipians 4:11-13
We can give the burdens, the unknowns, the frustrations, and the fears to Him by casting those cares on Him. 1Peter 5:7
At the end of the day and my life I want to know that I did what God called me to do. I want to hear “well done.”
So Where Are You in Your Difficult Season?
Check out these scriptures and read for yourself how God feels about complaining and entitlement. Exodus 16
I hope it grounds you and encourages you! God loved us so much that He gave us His only Son and the Counselor of the Holy Spirit.
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***All Scripture references can be found via Biblegateway
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